DIVORCE IN ISLAM: Islam tolerates divorce and separation of husband and wife under certain conditions. And Islam has stated the full procedure of divorce. Allah Almighty says:
ٱلطَّلَـٰقُ مَرَّتَانِ ۖ فَإِمْسَاكٌۢ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌۢ بِإِحْسَـٰنٍۢ ۗ
TRANSLATION: “Divorce is twice. Then [after that], either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment.” [Al Baqarah: 229]
⇒ It was narrated that ‘Abdullah said: “Divorce according to the Sunnah means divorcing her with one divorce in each cycle when she is pure, then when she becomes pure the third time, then he pronounces divorce again, and after that, she must wait for one more menstrual cycle.” [Sunan Ibn Majah 2021]
DIVORCE –IN THE THEORY OF ISLAM
Islam considers divorce to be abominable and reprehensible. Therefore, it has been condemned in the hadith.
أَبْغَضُ الْحَلَالِ إِلَى اللَّهِ الطلاقُ
Ibn ‘Umar reported the Prophet as saying, “The lawful thing which God hates most is divorce.”[ Mishkat al-Masabih 3280]
تزوّجوا و لا تطلّقوا؛ فإنّ الطلاق یهتزّ منه العرش
Marry and do not divorce because surely divorce shakes the very Throne of God.
⇒ Islam considers divorce to be a very ugly and shameful act, which should be avoided as much as possible as it shakes the Throne of God. Although it is not prohibited, it is strongly condemned for various reasons.
قال رسول الله (ص): «ما أحبّ الله مباحاً کالنکاح، و ما أبغض الله مباحاً کالطلاق.»
The Prophet of Allah (peace be upon Him) says: “Allah loves no permissible like marriage, and Allah hates no permissible like divorce.”
FOLLOW THE RULES OF ISLAM AND PREVENT YOUR HOUSE FROM DIVORCE!
To prevent divorce, Islam campaigns against its causes, some of which are listed below:
⇒ An influential factor in divorce is the husband’s dissatisfaction with his legitimate wife and her affection and love for non-mahram women. The main source of this is the lack of proper hijab in women and bowing in men. When a man sees a woman who is more attractive than his wife, he becomes infatuated with her and becomes disillusioned with his wife. Gradually he makes family life bitter by finding fault, making excuses, and quarrels, which may eventually lead to divorce.
To prevent this from happening, Islam commands women to wear proper hijabs, cover their attractiveness from men, and refrain from being attractive to anyone other than their husbands. With that Islam instructs men to refrain from looking at, joking with, and laughing with non-mahram women. If their eyes fall on a non-mahram woman, they should not delay and immediately avert their eyes.
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⇒ Another source of divorce is the couple’s indifference to each other and apathy and lack of passion in fulfilling each other’s sexual needs. Many divorces and separations occur when the husband or wife is not sufficiently sexually satisfied.
To prevent this, Islam instructs women to wear their best clothes at home, to conform to their husband’s wishes, and to express themselves passionately. Additionally, Islam commands men to take care of cleanliness and personal hygiene, adjust their manners, and be handsome and warm to their wives. Furthermore, Islam advises both women and men to not only think about their happiness and liberation while making love and having sex but also try to bring happiness and satisfaction to their partner.
⇒ The third catalyst for divorce is rudeness, caricature, quarrels, and obstinacy in the husband, wife, or both. Statistics show that the main reason for most divorces is the incompatibility of the behavior of the spouses.
Islam seeks to pre-empt these factors and strengthen the foundations of the sacred institution of the family by prescribing different rights and responsibilities for men and women. In addition, it counsels against selfishness, egotism, autocracy, and backwardness, and advocates tolerance, forgiveness, and resolving differences with reason, justice, and love.
HOW TO RESOLVE MARITAL DISPUTES AND PREVENT DIVORCE?
Islam also recommends the need for a team of mediators to resolve marital disputes and prevent divorce. This team consists of two mediators. One is chosen by the wife’s family, and one is chosen by the husband. They may be from the couple’s family or unrelated. The Qur’an says:
وَ إِنْ خِفْتُمْ شِقَاقَ بَيْنِهِمَا فَابْعَثُواْ حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهِ وَ حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهَا إِن يُرِيدَا إِصْلاَحًا يُوَفِّقِ اللّهُ بَيْنَهُمَا إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرًا
TRANSLATION: If you anticipate a split between them, appoint a mediator from his family and another from hers. If they desire reconciliation, Allah will restore harmony between them. Surely Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware.[An- NIsa: 35]
HOW THE TEAM OF MEDIATORS WILL WORK TO PREVENT DIVORCE?
A team of mediators arranges a meeting with the wife and husband to reconcile. They find out the problem, listen to both sides with gentleness and fairness, and counsel each one on their faults and shortcomings in friendship and love. They remind each spouse of their responsibilities. They then command the couple to commit to forgiveness, tolerance, adherence to marital duties, and strengthening the sacred institution of their marriage and family. He also warns them against the harmful effects of discord and separation. Thus, they restore harmony between the pair.
Another means that can prevent divorce or at least prevent it is payment of dowry. A man who has paid his wife’s dowry has no right to take it back, and if not, he must pay it in full before divorce. The Holy Quran says:
وَ إِنْ أَرَدتُّمُ اسْتِبْدَالَ زَوْجٍ مَّكَانَ زَوْجٍ وَ آتَيْتُمْ إِحْدَاهُنَّ قِنطَارًا فَلاَ تَأْخُذُواْ مِنْهُ شَيْئًا أَتَأْخُذُونَهُ بُهْتَاناً وَ إِثْماً مُّبِيناً* وَ كَيْفَ تَأْخُذُونَهُ وَ قَدْ أَفْضَى بَعْضُكُمْ إِلَى بَعْضٍ وَ أَخَذْنَ مِنكُم مِّيثَاقًا غَلِيظًا
TRANSLATION: If you desire to replace a wife with another and you have given the former ˹even˺ a stack of gold ˹as a dowry˺, do not take any of it back. Would you ˹still˺ take it unjustly and very sinfully?
CONCLUSION:
A home without love is cold, dark, and unwelcoming. This house has not only lost its peace in the eyes of the wife and husband, but it is a prison and a fiery hell. Marriage is the natural union of a man and a woman. It is quite different from all other social contracts like transactions, leases, mortgages, and agreements. So, we should follow the rules of Islam to avoid divorce.